VA buddy letter examples for spouses, friends, and people you served with

Your spouse may see what a short appointment does not: the help you need getting dressed, the tasks you have stopped doing, or the nights your sleep is interrupted. A buddy statement gives them a place to describe those observations in their own words.

Start with the example that matches who is writing and what they actually know. This guide includes five fictional examples: a spouse describing back pain, a spouse describing snoring and nighttime gasping, a spouse describing changes associated with PTSD, someone who witnessed an event during service, and a coworker describing changes at work.

Use the examples to understand the structure. Leave out anything that did not happen or that the witness did not observe.

TL;DR

• Start with how the writer knows you, what they personally observed, when they noticed it, and the effect they saw.
• Dates and frequency help when the writer knows them. An honest estimate is better than invented precision.
• A personal statement is your account. A witness statement is another person's account of what they know or observed.
• VA Form 21-10210 is one way to submit a lay or witness statement. VA also accepts other formats, described below.
• These examples explain how to write clearly. They do not estimate what a statement will do to the outcome of your claim.

Choose the example that fits

The condition label helps you find an example. It is not a checklist of symptoms to include. Choose the person who has relevant knowledge, then let them describe it.

What a buddy letter actually does

VA describes lay evidence as testimony from you or someone who knows about your condition or related events. The writer does not need specific training or education to provide it. VA reviews it alongside the other evidence you submit. VA evidence guidance.

A witness can add a perspective that is not clear from another record: what they saw during an event, what happens at home, or how everyday activities changed. State how the writer knows those facts. If they are describing something you told them, make that clear rather than presenting it as an event they witnessed.

Keep everyday observations separate from medical conclusions about a diagnosis or cause. VA's guidance says medical records or opinions are usually needed to support a link to service, while lay evidence may be accepted in some circumstances. A sample letter cannot tell you whether the evidence for your particular claim is enough. VA evidence guidance.

The five-part structure

1. Who is writing. The writer's name, relationship to you, and how long they have known you.
2. How they know. The circumstances that let them observe what they describe, such as living, serving, or working together.
3. What they observed. One or more specific examples, with dates, ranges, or frequency only when known.
4. What changed or was affected. Everyday tasks, work, or other activities they saw. If they do not know what things were like before, leave that comparison out.
5. Review and signature. The writer checks the facts and completes the applicable signature and contact fields on the form they use.

This is a writing outline, not a VA scoring formula. The current Form 21-10210 supplies the official fields and instructions.

The free template: fill in the blanks

Replace the brackets and remove any prompt that does not apply. The writer should use their own account; the template is not a reason to add a symptom, event, or date.

My name is [witness name]. I am [veteran name]'s [relationship], and I have known them since [year or approximate period].

I know about the events or changes below because [explain how you were present or how regularly you have contact].

I personally observed [describe one example]. This happened [date, approximate period, or frequency, if known].

I also observed [another relevant example, if you have one].

[If you know what changed, describe what you observed before and afterward. If not, leave this part out.]

[Describe any effect on everyday activities that you personally saw.]

After drafting, follow the current form's instructions for the statement, witness information, certification, signature, and date. Use a separate Form 21-10210 for each statement, as its instructions direct.

Spouse buddy letter: back pain

Fictional example. This spouse describes changes at home. They did not witness the original injury and do not claim to know its cause.

My name is [witness name]. I am [veteran name]'s spouse. We have lived together since 2018, and I am writing about changes I have personally observed at home.

Around the summer of 2024, I started helping [veteran name] put on socks on some mornings. I saw them stop while bending down and ask for help. I do not remember exactly how often this happened.

I now carry the laundry basket downstairs because I have seen [veteran name] put it down partway and ask me to finish. On a grocery trip last month, they stopped walking through the store, leaned on the cart, and asked to return to the car while I finished shopping.

I was not present for the injury during service. These are the changes I have seen while we have lived together.

What this example shows: the writer explains their observation period, describes concrete activities, and leaves uncertainty visible. It does not establish a diagnosis, medical cause, or particular rating by itself. The witness still needs to complete and sign the applicable parts of the form they use.

Example 1: Spouse letter for sleep apnea (a wife's statement)

Fictional example. Do not copy its dates, symptoms, or events unless they are true for the person writing.

My name is [full name], and I have been married to [veteran's name] since June 2012. We have shared a bedroom for the entire marriage, and I am writing to describe what I personally observe about his sleep.

Beginning around 2014, I started waking up at night because [veteran] would stop breathing. The pattern is the same: loud snoring, then silence for several seconds, then a choking or gasping sound as he startles partly awake. In a typical week I witness this on four or five nights. On bad nights it happens repeatedly and I have timed the silent stretches at ten seconds or longer. I began sleeping in the guest room roughly twice a week in 2018 because of it.

During the day he fights to stay awake. He has fallen asleep mid-afternoon on weekends nearly every week for years, has asked me to drive on trips longer than an hour because he does not trust himself to stay alert, and drinks coffee continuously through the workday. I reminded him for over a year to talk to a doctor about his sleep before he finally did.

I certify that the statements above are true and correct to the best of my knowledge and belief.

[Signature, printed name, date]

What this example shows: The writer describes sounds and behavior they personally observed, the period when they observed them, and effects at home. A sleep diagnosis or its cause is a separate question. The same structure can work for a husband, wife, partner, or another person with relevant firsthand knowledge.

Example 2: Spouse letter for PTSD and mental health

Fictional example. Do not copy its dates, symptoms, or events unless they are true for the person writing.

My name is [full name]. I met [veteran's name] in 2005, two years before his second deployment, and we married in 2009. I am describing the differences I have personally observed since he returned in 2011.

Before that deployment, [veteran] slept normally, kept close friendships from high school, and took our son to games and crowded events without a second thought. Since 2011, I observe the following on a regular basis. He wakes up two to three nights a week soaked in sweat, sometimes shouting. He checks the locks on our doors every night in a fixed order, and if I interrupt the routine he starts over. In restaurants he will not sit unless he can see the entrance, and twice in the last year we left before ordering because he could not settle. He stopped attending our son's indoor games in about 2015; he waits in the truck and listens to the crowd noise from the parking lot.

His two closest friends stopped calling around 2016 after he canceled plans repeatedly. Family gatherings now last as long as he can manage, which is usually under an hour.

I certify that the statements above are true and correct to the best of my knowledge and belief.

[Signature, printed name, date]

What this example shows: The writer knew the veteran before and after the period described, so the comparison has a stated basis. The activities, dates, and frequency belong to this fictional example. They are not symptoms someone should copy to seek a particular rating.

Example 3: Fellow service member letter for an in-service injury

Fictional example. Do not copy its dates, symptoms, or events unless they are true for the person writing.

My name is [full name]. I served with [veteran's name] in [unit] at [base] from 2008 to 2011, first as his team leader and then as his squad leader. This statement describes an event I witnessed personally.

In approximately August 2009, during a field exercise at [training area], I watched [veteran] fall roughly eight feet from the back ramp of a vehicle while we were unloading equipment in the rain. He landed on his back across a rucksack frame. He got up and finished the exercise, which lasted three more days, because that is what our unit culture expected. I remember him moving stiffly for the rest of that field problem and borrowing ibuprofen from several of us.

To my knowledge he did not go to sick call at the time. For the remainder of our time serving together, he complained of low back pain after rucks and long vehicle movements, and I adjusted his duties on at least two occasions because of it.

I certify that the statements above are true and correct to the best of my knowledge and belief.

[Signature, printed name, rank at the time, date]

What this example shows: The writer identifies where their knowledge comes from, describes the event they witnessed, and explains what they noticed afterward. Their statement does not establish why every medical record is missing or guarantee that VA will accept the event as described.

Example 4: Coworker letter for work impact

Fictional example. Do not copy its dates, symptoms, or events unless they are true for the person writing.

My name is [full name]. I have been [veteran's name]'s direct supervisor at [company] since March 2019, and I interact with him on the job four to five days per week.

Over the past three years I have personally observed [veteran]'s migraines end his workday. When one starts, he becomes visibly pale, stops speaking in full sentences, and has to sit in the break room with the lights off before someone drives him home. In 2025 I documented eleven days when he left early or missed work entirely for this reason; in the first half of 2026 there have been seven. I have reassigned deadline work around his absences and moved him off two client-facing projects because we could not rely on his availability.

He is a capable employee when he is well. The problem I observe is frequency and unpredictability.

I certify that the statements above are true and correct to the best of my knowledge and belief.

[Signature, printed name, title, date]

What this example shows: The writer describes work changes they observed and distinguishes recorded absences from general impressions. It does not determine a disability rating or establish an inability to work by itself.

Common questions before someone signs

What if my spouse met me after service? They can describe what they know from the period when they knew you. Make that starting point clear. Do not make the statement sound as though they witnessed an earlier event they did not see.

What if the writer cannot remember an exact date? They can say that. Use an approximate month, season, year, or range only if it reflects their memory. Do not replace an estimate with a precise date just to make the statement look complete.

Can an example or AI help with the draft? It can help organize a starting draft, but it cannot supply the witness's memories. The writer should check every fact, remove invented details, and confirm that the finished statement says what they mean.

What if two records give different dates? Check what each date describes. One may refer to an event and another to when a symptom changed. Keep the original records and explain any difference honestly; do not change a memory just to make the dates match.

Is my personal statement the same as a buddy statement? Your personal statement is your account. A witness statement is another person's account. Form 21-10210 can be used by a claimant or someone writing on their behalf. VA Form 21-10210.

Check the draft for clarity

• Basis of knowledge: Can the reader tell how the writer knows each fact?
• Honest detail: Are dates and frequency known, approximate, or not remembered? Keep that distinction.
• Observation versus conclusion: Describe what happened without adding a medical explanation the writer cannot support.
• Individual voice: Use the witness's own account rather than giving several people the same finished statement.
• Unresolved differences: Preserve uncertainty and explain differences instead of quietly making records agree.

How to submit them

VA lists several ways to provide lay evidence: a statement on plain paper, Form 21-10210, or Form 21-4138. VA evidence guidance.

If you use Form 21-10210, follow the current form's instructions and complete its applicable information, certification, signature, and date fields. The form directs writers to identify the issue they are addressing and use a separate form for each statement. VA's form page also links an online submission option. Keep a copy of what you submit. Form page · Download the current PDF.

Ask someone to describe what they saw

Choose someone who knows the event or change you want to describe. Give them a starting point, then let them write their own account.

If you are the witness, you can start with the public guided builder. It asks about your relationship to the veteran and what you personally observed.

Start a buddy letter

You can start drafting without an account. Review every line before signing.

If you are the veteran and want to send and track a request, the buddy-statement tool page explains that separate option for signed-in members with plan access. A completed statement in Claim Raven is not proof that it has been submitted to VA.

Sources and limitations

• This guide uses VA's current evidence guidance and Form 21-10210, checked September 8, 2026. Follow the instructions on the form when you use it.
• All five examples are fictional teaching samples. They do not estimate an outcome or determine whether a particular claim has enough evidence.
• An earlier version included Board-outcome figures. Those figures have been removed while their record definitions and supporting analysis are reviewed. This writing guide does not use them to predict the effect of a statement.

Where to go next

• Buddy statements in the Claims Guide
• Request a buddy statement
• More Claim Raven guides

This is general education, not legal or medical advice. An accredited VSO representative can help with a VA benefit claim for free. Find accredited help through VA.

Landon Founder, Claim Raven | U.S. Army Veteran